(ANDERSON VALLEY ADVERTISER - November 3, 1999)

ANDERSON VALLEY ADVERTISER,

November 3, l999

OFF THE RECORD SECTION:

POINT ARENA'S PARROT PEOPLE have been given 15 days to remove their birds from Windy Hollow Road, but will fight what amounts to the County's eviction order. As another only-in-Mendocino dispute becomes grist for the national media mill, the County's Planning and building Department last week ordered Geoffrey and Barbara Gould to remove 100 or so parrots from the 15.8 acres of Point Arena property the Goulds bought on Windy Hollow Road early last spring. Soon after the Goulds arrived from Arizona with their birds, Nicholas Turkey Farms, owned by a British conglomerate, and also a resident of Windy Hollow Road, demanded that the parrots leave because they can carry avian diseases fatal to turkeys. But the County's order that the parrots depart Windy Hollow Road is based on the County's zoning code section which says the breeding of creatures destined for lives as pets is incompatible with the area's ag zoning. In other words, you cant eat macaws.

BUT IT'S ALL more complicated than a case of incompatible bird species. The Windy Hollow turkeys perch on property owned by the Stornetta dairy products juggernaut. The Stornettas are one of the wealthiest and most influential families on the Mendocino Coast, their influence buttressed by their 60 million annual dollars dairy business. The combined resources of the turkeys and the cows dwarf those of Mr. and Mrs. Gould, but the Goulds are fighting their 15-day cease and desist notice. They've put up the thousand plus dollars required to appeal their expulsion.

THE TURKEY PEOPLE want the parrots out because to co-exist turkeys and parrrots must be kept scrupulously apart. The Stornettas also want the parrots gone from Windy Hollow Road, but for much different reasons than Nicholas Farms, the turkey people, want the parrots out. Which is where the plot thickens to become a truly splendid cynicism by both the turkey people and the Stornettas.

THE CYNICISM. The turkey people have been in a long dispute with the Stornettas over their lease with the Stornettas. The turkey people, long before the parrots arrived on Windy Hollow Road, had made plans to move and had begun to move their flock to the state of Washington. The Stornettas were and are very unhappy at losing their long-time tenant. It isn't every day a wealthy turkey breeder rents a piece of land in Point Arena for much more money than that land would otherwise generate. The Stornettas, then, wanted the turkey to stay on Windy Hollow Road and the parrots arrived just in time to give the Stornettas big leverage in their dispute with their departing tenants, Nicholas Farms. The parrots' arrival was also helpful to Nicholas Farms who could now plausibly say to the Stornettas, "We have to move to Washington state because the parrots are here and threaten the welfare of American traditions, i.e., Thanksgiving and Christmas, the only time of year people eat the damn things." On their part, the Stornettas can plausibly say, "We got the parrots outta here so your turkeys are safe and you have no reason to move to Washington state."

IF THE PARROT PEOPLE are forced out of the neighborhood the turkey people have no excuse (or at least less of an excuse) for breaking their lease agreement with the Stornettas. Both the Stornettas and the turkey people were fully aware the turkeys were already on their way to Washington state when the parrots arrived. But even with the turkeys at roost a thousand miles to the north, the Goulds will have to get a zoning exception for their tiny enterprise because it is not a permitted use on ag-zoned Windy Hollow Road.

THE WELL CONNECTED get zoning exemptions all the time, of course, most recently the Van Peer Boatworks in Fort Bragg, and industrial boat building outfit plunked down in a residential neighborhood. But the parrot people aren't particularly well connected and official Mendocino County has never ever gone head to head with the kind of money and influence the Stornettas and Nicholas Farms can bring down on a small flock of macaws, never mind official Mendocino County itself. Mrs. Gould, clearly not the kind of person who is easily intimidated, is nonetheless confident that the parrots can beat back the combined forces of turkeys, cows and bureaucrats. "We have science on our side," she says.

ENTER SCIENCE and the experts. The turkey people's expert says that parrots might possibly could maybe perhaps infect the turkeys with one or another fatal avian disease. The parrot people's expert says everybody in the bird business knows that parrots can infect turkeys, but that ordinary inoculating and prophylactic procedures already in place at both businesses protect each from the other. The parrot people's expert would seem to be the trump expert. His name is Dr. West. West is on the faculty of U.C. Davis and also functions as the State of California's final authority on avian matters. He has informed Mr. and Mrs. Gould that not only will he testify on their behalf, he is eager to testify for them. Meanwhile, the parrots remain on Windy Hollow Road, the turkeys continue to fly north to Washington state, the Stornettas fume. Dont bet against the parrots just yet.

Note that to date the turkey farm has been "cleaning up' their property. Dump trucks have been going down Windy Hollow road at the rate of 20+ loads a day for over a week now. Perhaps the neighboring Pomo Indian Reservation will not have to suffer the pungent smells from the Turkey Operation all summer long this next season. bg FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO LIVE IN NORTHERN CALIFORNIA, WE HAVE ASKED FOR A BOYCOTT OF STORNETTA DAIRY PRODUCTS. THANK YOU.